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My First Melon Purchase

(Photo by Haywood Magee/Picture Post/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

It’s another milestone in my adulthood.  I purchased a melon at the grocery store.  I seriously had never bought any type of melon fruit before May 31st, 2011.  I guess the reason is I was afraid I would pick a bad one.  After the avocado disaster of ’10, I’ve been pretty tentative of trying new things.  (I bought way too unripe avocados and tried to make guacamole.  It was a disaster.)  I mustered up the courage, went to the store, and made my pick.

Much like a draft pick in sports, you need to do a little research on what kind of melon you are looking for.  I didn’t want anything too sweet, nothing too mushy, and I didn’t want seeds.  After asking around, I went with the classic honey dew melon.

So how do you pick a melon?  I didn’t know.  I know I’m terrible at picking vegetables.  I always get the spoiled ones.  When you pick an apple or a banana you want to get one that is firm.  With a melon, they are all firm.  I had to use a lifeline and call my wife.  She told me to knock on the melon and find one that sounds hollow.

I got to the grocery store.  There sat the melons.  I walked up to them, and gently knocked on 3 melons.  The first one had more of a thump noise.  I shook my head in disapproval.  The second was really heavy and didn’t sound much better than the first.  The third had a hollow sound.  I nodded my head contently in approval.  This was my melon.

I then ran into another obstacle.  How do I cut this thing up?  I set the melon on the counter and stared at it for a few minutes.  Ah, screw it.  My wife can cut it up when she gets home.

When she got home, she cut up the melon and it was delicious.  I picked a great melon.  I’m all grown up now!

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