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6 Unplanned Things That Always Happen At A Kegger Even As You’re An Adult Now

(Photo by Joe Raedle/Newsmakers)

Recently we had a get together that involved quite a bit of people.  I thought it would be good to get a keg, now that we are in our 30′s and adult enough to responsibly handle the magnitude of 16 gallons of beer on hand.  It was a great time, however I couldn’t help but notice some things that have continued to occur, even as we are older.   I thought these unplanned circumstances only resulted from being young (when we used to have kegs), but apparently the keg itself will draw these mysterious occurrences.  Such as…

1.  Complete strangers showing up.  Every kegger has a mystery person or two that no one knows who they are.   Did they just walk off the street?   Who are these people.

2.  Garbage everywhere.  It’s a party, I get it.   Eventually after people drink a few beverages they start treating their surroundings like a dump.   Drop things wherever they wish.   Although our party wasn’t bad, I did find a bunch of jello shot containers scattered around our yard and a half eaten hot dog in my toolbox.

You’d never have a keg at an earth day party.  It would be too shameful to mother earth.

3.  21 year old show up.  All of my friends are near my age which happens to be at the age where we go to bed at decent times and don’t usually over do it.   That happens when you are a parent.  You don’t have time for hangovers.  However, at some point usually later you’ll start noticing younger people around.   Friends of friends, maybe younger co-workers.  And they came to DRINK!

4.  Keg stands.   This goes along with number 3.  I haven’t seen keg stands done in a very long time, but of course I saw one at our get together.   The difference?   I was the guy warning that if anybody threw up, spit up, or got sick they’d have to clean up and get the hell out.   Crabby old guy alert.

5.   There’s always more beer than you think.  Not to say we didn’t finish the keg in a relatively short amount of time, but it lasts longer than you think.  You pick up the keg and it seems pretty light, but you still get quite a few more pours out of it.   Then when you think it’s an eternal source of beer, it spits out it’s last drops.

6.  The world becomes a toilet.  More for the guys, but at every Kegger that beer has to go somewhere.   After a few drinks any bush will do and your guests have watered your lawn quite well after dark.

 

 

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