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5 Reasons The World Won’t Let Me Sleep

This is a sleep deprived rant.  I just have to get it out.  It’s Thursday Morning, and since Monday I’ve had 6 1/2 hours of sleep.  That’s not good.  I’m starting to lose my sense of reality.  Here’s why I can’t sleep.

1.  Excited about fishing opener. I’m so excited I can’t sleep, yet I know I need to get my rest because I’ll be driving about 200 freaking miles on Friday.

2.  Our son seems to always have an issue at 3-3:30 in the morning. Tuesday night it was a nightmare.  Last night he fell out of bed.  I should mention that he has a bed rail that goes the entire length of the bed.  The only way possible to fall out of that bad is if he worms all the way to the foot of the bed, sneaks through the 1 foot gap, and dives off… in his sleep.   I still have no idea how that happens.  Also, a 40 lb kid hitting the floor sounds like an intruder busting in the front door.

3.  When you are woken up within an hour of your alarm going off, you’re screwed. If I fall back asleep now, I can get 59 minutes of sleep….  55 minutes of sleep…. 40 minutes of sleep……. 33 minutes of sleep…… AH THE HELL WITH IT!  I’LL JUST GET UP!

2.   When you almost fall back asleep, you’re wife hits you in the face. Yep, just about ready to drift off and WHAP! How is it we have a king size bed and this still happens?

1.  THAT GOD DAMN CAT! Just drifting off to sleep and the cat decides she wants to crawl up on my shoulder and perch on my shoulder…  then meow constantly.

So let’s look at the positives, something I’ve tried to do more lately.

Everybody else got to sleep, I’m the only one suffering…

The cat didn’t get hurt when I tossed her across the room…

I got to work early enough I beat the early morning riser rush at the gas station.  (usually it’s a line of 3 people, today there was just a crazy guy rambling.)

I learned that my wife’s shaving cream doesn’t make a good shampoo.



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